Seed and Rain…..

SEED AND RAIN….. Have you thought about your WORD lately? Many times over the years i’ve talked about a word from GOD. I”ve usually begin to pray about JULY for a “WORD” from God for the next year. I don’t do New Years resolutions. It’s not that daily word but THAT WORD. the one that helps to guide you and give you insight for the coming year. You know they say that hindsight is 20/20. I can say that over the last few years that has been so true. Redeemed was my word about 4 years ago and that was a turning point in my walk with GOD that year. I found myself in HIS word more, thinking upon HIS will for my life more and reaching out to others more. Then the year following my word was SIMPLIFY. Honestly i’ve talked before about how I thought that word made no sense. Then God proved me wrong. Lost my eye sight in one eye which led to losing my job , then lost my husband 10 months later, Life doesn’t get much simpler than that. THEN for the last 2 years my word has been FLY. AS many of you know that came from a very personal encounter with GOD shortly after Dennis died.
I attended a yoga retreat about two weeks ago and the truth is GOD gave me some things to ponder over as my “take away”. Those things are requiring me to TAKE ACTION. Something that has been hard for me since Dennis died truthfully. I”ve found myself in a cocoon just trying to breathe, trying to stay still so I wouldn’t draw attention to myself, get hurt further and inside that cocoon I’ve been LISTENING and waiting on the LORD as HE was repairing my heart. AM i there yet, NOT completely. Truth is I don’t think we are EVER really there on this side of HEAVEN. What I DO know now about GRIEF is that there really aren’t 5 steps and it is over and when people say “your strong”, “Your going to be fine”, they themselves have NEVER LOST anyone that changed their life.
GRIEF is a life changer a different kind of way. IT’s not just about losing the one you love, but it moves you into a place where you no longer HAVE that person WHO LOVED YOU. Can you imagine NOT being LOVED by someone? It changes everything. How people treat you, what your included in moving forward, and so much more that I won’t even begin to list here. BUT the GOOD NEWS is that GRIEF is a teacher of many things as well. Along with the pain and the hurt comes MUCH LOVE and understanding from GOD. You find yourself in a place of truly seeking what PEACE REALLY IS.
This is a LONG LONG way around the block to tell you that I’M WORKING ON A PLACE. A building that I’ve had my eye on for over two years. You probably ride by it many times a week if your from my neck of the woods and have watched it deteriorate for a long time BUT even in that there is LIFE. Like myself over these last 28 months I felt at times that I wasn’t going to be okay again. I wasn’t sure I would ever be able to actually purpose my heart towards something. This place just needs some TLC. TENDER LOVING CARE. Don’t we all. I’m excited for the first time in a long time about the future. I Can’t wait to see all the things GOD is going to do there. I”ve already dedicated it to HIM.
The day I was to close on the new/old place ( building) a dear friend of mine and I went to “pray over this building”. As we laid our hands to it and we released the words of prayer it began to rain. Not a hard rain but a shower of “blessings”. (I’m talking about a out of no where kind of shower where the sun was still shining kind of thing) I’ve always had this thing about rain. I truly do believe that in that moment it was a sign from GOD that He was reassuring me to trust HIM and to measure me that HE is planting a seed. His word says, “I’m doing a NEW thing” . It felt so good, it was so cool on that hot morning. I love the way GOD continues to guide us in such subtle ways. ALL IS IN HIS TIMING.
I’m so thankful that I’m just a small little seed who GOD can continue to cultivate and hopefully use to help others. One day soon the doors will open and I hope you will be there. I hope that you will SEEK HIM as I SEEK HIM for better health and wholeness. ( mind, body and spirit)