The truth hurts….. Can I be honest? Warning…. LONG POST !!

Over these last few months I’ve struggled to hear GOD’s voice. The hunger for His instruction has increased. I want him to shout it out, make no mistake, just give it to me straight. There have been many times in my life when I knew exactly what God was saying, what he was asking me to do and how He was guiding me. That has not been the case since Dennis died. Is it just me OR DO YOU sometimes have trouble hearing God’s Voice?
I’ve been wondering why I can’t seem to hear him as well these days and truth is a friend of mine and I were just having a conversation about it tonight. You know those friends whom you can be transparent with. Just as I finished getting ready for bed I came and sat down to check the weather for the week and I glanced at my emails one last time and it just sorta JUMPED out at me. “CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW? ”
INSERT NOW. ( article from Proverbs 31 women)
Can You Hear Me Now? LEAH DIPASCAL
“My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me.” John 10:27 (ESV)
Maybe you’ve heard someone say, “The Lord told me _____” or “I’ve sensed the Lord saying _____ to my heart.” Did it make you wonder if you could discern God’s voice too?
Maybe like me, you’ve wondered: Is it really possible to hear God’s voice? Can I know when He is speaking to me? Maybe that was just a random thought? What if I make a decision based on what I think God is saying and then discover I was wrong … then what?
I wrestled with these questions several years ago when our family was going through a tough time. Much was at stake, and despite numerous conversations with my husband, considering every option, it was clear that a sacrifice was required.
One morning, as I stared into my bathroom mirror — trying to ignore the knot in my stomach and holding back a wall of tears — I turned on my blow dryer and started drying my hair.
I asked again, “Lord, what if I can’t discern what You’re telling me? Will all the chaos and thoughts swirling in my mind drown out Your voice?”
As the high-pitched sound of my blow dryer blasted away, I began to hear another sound. It was muffled and faded, yet I was aware of it.
I ignored the sound at first, but even with my blow dryer going, I could still hear a familiar tone.
I turned off the blow dryer and surprisingly heard my friend Renee Swope. Confused at first, I walked into the bedroom and realized her voice was coming from the radio. She and Proverbs 31 Ministries President, Lysa TerKeurst, host a daily broadcast called “Everyday Life with Lysa and Renee.”
Renee and I have been friends for years. We’ve spent lots of time together engaging in honest and transparent conversations.
As I listened to Renee’s voice, the thought came to me, “Because you know Renee so well and have spent a lot of time with her, you can discern her voice, despite the overwhelming noise of the blow dryer.”
I realized God was teaching me a new truth about discerning His voice.
Just like my close relationship with Renee, God showed me that a close relationship with Him — based on truth, transparency and time invested — was essential to discerning His voice.
Over the years, as I’ve spent more time in God’s presence — through prayer, reading His Word and singing songs of worship — I’ve come to know Him better and recognize His voice.
Maybe you’ve felt like God has been silent lately. Like you’re not sure God actually speaks to you or that you’re capable of discerning His voice. If so, let me give you three things to consider:
Believe: Jesus said in John 8:47a, “Whoever belongs to God hears what God says” (NIV). If you’ve accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, then you belong to Him. You already have the capability of discerning God’s voice when He speaks to you. This happens through the work of the Holy Spirit.
Anticipate: 1 Samuel 3:9b says, “Speak, LORD, for your servant is listening” (NIV). What if we approached each day with an attitude of anticipation, making this verse a welcome invitation for the Lord to speak to us? Let’s set our hearts and minds to a place of readiness as we wait to hear from God.
Follow: Jesus said in John 10:27, “My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me” (ESV). God doesn’t just speak to be heard. He speaks to be obeyed. When we discern God’s voice of direction or correction, we have to be willing to follow in obedience.
That day in my bathroom was a defining moment. I didn’t receive a specific answer to what our family was supposed to do. But I did receive a beautiful promise from God, that when the time was right, He would let us know. And no noise from this world would block out His voice, as long as we stayed close to Him.
Dear God, help me discern Your voice. Give me an attitude of anticipation to wake up every morning and say, “Speak, Lord, your servant is listening.” And when You speak, let me be faithful to follow and obey You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
TRUTH FOR TODAY:Isaiah 30:21, “Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, ‘This is the way; walk in it.’” (NIV)
Jeremiah 33:3, “Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.” (NIV)
ME AGAIN….
First I want to say that God is absolutely amazing. I mean within seconds after closing out my conversation with my friend here was this little reminder.
I read it and I re-read it and then I began to speak out-loud to God. So has my heart been in such pain that I couldn’t absorb your voice, has my mind been so pre-occupied with my “what am I to do now ” that my brain has been foggy, or has the loneliness and the desire to be alone sometimes, caused my insides to push YOUR voice away?
I wanted to think none of those but I read the devotional again. The message in His word is pretty simple. STAY CLOSE TO ME, spend TIME with me, Show me your affection HE says. I don’t know about you but I need His guidance and His instruction, but most of all I simply need daily communion with HIM. FORGIVE me GOD for turning your volume down with my broken heart.

Little Golden Nuggets that Show up in your INBOX.

This article showed up in my inbox today. It affected me two ways.
1. It aligned with the things that i’ve been feeling for some time and it made me realize that in this grief fog that I live in some days, it’s okay.
2. It also prompted me to POST this for others who might be facing the Grief Monster themselves.
There is so much you just simply don’t understand during these times. The main thing that STOOD out to me was “Trauma permanently changes us”. There is no truer statement than that. Hope you will read this and please pass it along to anyone that you know is struggling with Grief. NOW FOR THE ARTICLE….
By Catherine Woodiwiss 01-13-2014
I wasn’t really expecting painful things to happen to me.
I knew that pain was a part of life, but — thanks in part to a peculiar blend of “God-has-a-plan” Southern roots, a suburban “Midwestern nice” upbringing, and a higher education in New England stoicism — I managed to skate by for quite some time without having to acknowledge it.
After a handful of traumas in the last five years, things look different now. Trauma upends everything we took for granted, including things we didn’t know we took for granted. And many of these realities I wish I’d known when I first encountered them. So, while the work of life and healing continues, here are ten things I’ve learned about trauma along the way:
1. Trauma permanently changes us.
This is the big, scary truth about trauma: there is no such thing as “getting over it.” The five stages of grief model marks universal stages in learning to accept loss, but the reality is in fact much bigger: a major life disruption leaves a new normal in its wake. There is no “back to the old me.” You are different now, full stop.
Trauma upends everything we took for granted, including things we didn’t know we took for granted.
This is not a wholly negative thing. Healing from trauma can also mean finding new strength and joy. The goal of healing is not a papering-over of changes in an effort to preserve or present things as normal. It is to acknowledge and wear your new life — warts, wisdom, and all — with courage.
2. Presence is always better than distance.
There is a curious illusion that in times of crisis people “need space.” I don’t know where this assumption originated, but in my experience it is almost always false. Trauma is a disfiguring, lonely time even when surrounded in love; to suffer through trauma alone is unbearable. Do not assume others are reaching out, showing up, or covering all the bases.
It is a much lighter burden to say, “Thanks for your love, but please go away,” than to say, “I was hurting and no one cared for me.” If someone says they need space, respect that. Otherwise, err on the side of presence.
3. Healing is seasonal, not linear.
It is true that healing happens with time. But in the recovery wilderness, emotional healing looks less like a line and more like a wobbly figure-8. It’s perfectly common to get stuck in one stage for months, only to jump to another end entirely … only to find yourself back in the same old mud again next year.
Recovery lasts a long, long time. Expect seasons.
4. Surviving trauma takes “firefighters” and “builders.” Very few people are both.
This is a tough one. In times of crisis, we want our family, partner, or dearest friends to be everything for us. But surviving trauma requires at least two types of people: the crisis team — those friends who can drop everything and jump into the fray by your side, and the reconstruction crew — those whose calm, steady care will help nudge you out the door into regaining your footing in the world. In my experience, it is extremely rare for any individual to be both a firefighter and a builder. This is one reason why trauma is a lonely experience. Even if you share suffering with others, no one else will be able to fully walk the road with you the whole way.
“Surviving trauma takes “firefighters” and “builders.”
Very few people are both.
A hard lesson of trauma is learning to forgive and love your partner, best friend, or family even when they fail at one of these roles. Conversely, one of the deepest joys is finding both kinds of companions beside you on the journey.
5. Grieving is social, and so is healing.
For as private a pain as trauma is, for all the healing that time and self-work will bring, we are wired for contact. Just as relationships can hurt us most deeply, it is only through relationship that we can be most fully healed.
It’s not easy to know what this looks like — can I trust casual acquaintances with my hurt? If my family is the source of trauma, can they also be the source of healing? How long until this friend walks away? Does communal prayer help or trivialize?
Grieving is social, and so is healing.
Seeking out shelter in one another requires tremendous courage, but it is a matter of life or paralysis. One way to start is to practice giving shelter to others.
6. Do not offer platitudes or comparisons. Do not, do not, do not.
“I’m so sorry you lost your son, we lost our dog last year … ” “At least it’s not as bad as … ” “You’ll be stronger when this is over.” “God works in all things for good!”
When a loved one is suffering, we want to comfort them. We offer assurances like the ones above when we don’t know what else to say. But from the inside, these often sting as clueless, careless, or just plain false.
Trauma is terrible. What we need in the aftermath is a friend who can swallow her own discomfort and fear, sit beside us, and just let it be terrible for a while.
7. Allow those suffering to tell their own stories.
Of course, someone who has suffered trauma may say, “This made me stronger,” or “I’m lucky it’s only (x) and not (z).” That is their prerogative. There is an enormous gulf between having someone else thrust his unsolicited or misapplied silver linings onto you, and discovering hope for one’s self. The story may ultimately sound very much like “God works in all things for good,” but there will be a galaxy of disfigurement and longing and disorientation in that confession. Give the person struggling through trauma the dignity of discovering and owning for himself where, and if, hope endures.
8. Love shows up in unexpected ways.
This is a mystifying pattern after trauma, particularly for those in broad community: some near-strangers reach out, some close friends fumble to express care. It’s natural for us to weight expressions of love differently: a Hallmark card, while unsatisfying if received from a dear friend, can be deeply touching coming from an old acquaintance.
Ultimately every gesture of love, regardless of the sender, becomes a step along the way to healing. If there are beatitudes for trauma, I’d say the first is, “Blessed are those who give love to anyone in times of hurt, regardless of how recently they’ve talked or awkwardly reconnected or visited cross-country or ignored each other on the metro.” It may not look like what you’d request or expect, but there will be days when surprise love will be the sweetest.
9. Whatever doesn’t kill you …
In 2011, after a publically humiliating year, comedian Conan O’Brien gave students at Dartmouth College the following warning:
“Nietzsche famously said, ‘Whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.’ … What he failed to stress is that it almost kills you.”
Odd things show up after a serious loss and creep into every corner of life: insatiable anxiety in places that used to bring you joy, detachment or frustration towards your closest companions, a deep distrust of love or presence or vulnerability.
There will be days when you feel like a quivering, cowardly shell of yourself, when despair yawns as a terrible chasm, when fear paralyzes any chance for pleasure. This is just a fight that has to be won, over and over and over again.
This is just a fight that has to be won, over and over and over again.
10. … Doesn’t kill you.
Living through trauma may teach you resilience. It may help sustain you and others in times of crisis down the road. It may prompt humility. It may make for deeper seasons of joy. It may even make you stronger.
It also may not.
In the end, the hope of life after trauma is simply that you have life after trauma. The days, in their weird and varied richness, go on. So will you.

 

my manCatherine Woodiwiss is Associate Web Editor at Sojourners. Find her on Twitter @chwoodiwiss.This piece originally appeared in Catapult magazine’s January issue, Ten Things.

Comparison…

Don’t do IT…… God created each and every one of us with our own purpose, our own look, our own style, our own personality… JUST BE YOU. Don’t compare yourself to anyone. ( that’s for someone tonight)

 

comparison