When My December Changed….

WHEN my December changed.
December has always been one of my favorite times of the year. It’s my birthday month, Christ Birth, Santa comes, my house is filled with lights and sparkles, beautifully wrapped gifts appear, fabulous food shared with friends and family and when I was a little girl we would usually make our way to Kentucky for Christmas with my grandparents. TRUTH is December always brings joy to my heart. I remember the stockings that my mother would always make for us. They seemed to be a MILE long and filled from TOP to bottom with trinkets, fruit and of course money.
The first year Dennis and I moved into this “ole” house I put up 5 Christmas Trees. It was pure splendor. Truth is however it was during Christmas that I saw Dennis sorry lose his cool. One of those RARE moments. We went Christmas tree shopping in the woods.. (ALERT.. you can’t tell how big they really are in the woods) I had chosen one, it was gorgeous and about 14 feet tall. He was telling me the whole time, “its not gonna fit”. That was a fun evening. Ha
On December 2, 2014 my December changed. It changed forever. This December is no less painful in remembering the night I lost the “love of my life”. He was an amazing man. It seems crazy that he has been gone for 3 years. I’m sure my friends are probably tired of hearing about Dennis, but talking about HIM keeps him Alive. Many have ask “why do you stay in this BIG OLE house?”, well see, staying here helps me remember our time together.
I’ve had so many questions over the last three years but the one thing I’m sure about…… is that GOD has used this tragedy in my life to grow me, to mold me, to draw me closer to HIM and to restore my soul. My heart
(broken) will never be the same, but my LOVE for CHRIST will never waiver.
Things I’ve learned from that December.
• December is a time for settling in
• December is a time for reflection
• December is a time for rest and healing.
• December is a time for renewal and restoration.
• December is a time to STOP, pause and prepare your heart for new things. You know it won’t be long before spring comes.
* Cherish the LITTLE THINGs, they are what matter.
• December is a time to celebrate LIFE and to get STILL before the Lord.
As I ponder over December, it includes all the GOOD times we had through the years YET, the heartache of grief. Grief is a monster and a teacher all at the same time. It can kill you or it can grow you. It can mold you in ways you never knew existed inside of you.
This December I am so thankful for CHRIST first and foremost. For HIS love and unwavering comfort. I am thankful for family and friends that always seem to have my back. AND last but not least, I am thankful that Dennis gave me all he had…. Not just in life… but continues to in spirit. One of these pictures that i’m posting is one of my favorites cause it is actually made in front of one of our Christmas Trees. It’s a sweet reminder that DECEMBER is a great time.
“Hope is somewhere between take off and landing…”

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“May the God of your hope so fill you with all joy and peace in believing that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound and be overflowing with hope.”
-Romans 15:13

Moving Day- written back in October.

MOVING DAY…..
WELL 22 years ago today Dennis and I were putting the final touches on PROJECT “MOVE to Newton.” After much persuasion I finally convinced HIM that we should move back to my “home” town. Newton, “A Great small town” as they called it. I can remember that day like it was yesterday. WE had rented the biggest U-Haul they had, both vehicles were filled to the brim, both boys were loaded up and our sweet dog SMURF was in tow. It was a cool fall day and we were off. That 62 mile drive from Brandon seems like an adventure to Montana that day.
I’m getting ahead of myself. Let me back up to the transformation stage. This OLD house you see was an absolute wreck when we moved in it. WE had ridden over to Newton one Sunday just looking around at different places and truth is from the moment I put my eyes on this place I fell in love. The Holly bushes had turned into HUGE TREES out front and you could hardly see the house from the road. It had been sitting empty for some time. Renters had left it sorta a wreck on the inside so it took me awhile to get the owners to even agree to allow us to look at it. ( thanks to you… You know who you are… )
FINALLY the Sunday came and we made a second drive over and met the OWNER. He was like, “what you see is what you get. We really don’t want to rent the place. We have had some bad experiences”.
I have to tell ya there was much wrong to the naked eye. Old green carpet, no heat or air, kitchen was old school, No dishwasher, needed paint badly and when you walked up onto the front porch the old boards had given way to weather and wear and you would literally fall through. I did say to the naked eye right? WELL my little imaginary driven brain went to work. I could see it in my MINDS eye already fixed up. We looked at everything and left. The owner said, “well let me know what ya’ll think.” THE moment we got in the car and backed out Dennis looked at me and said, “baby, have you LOST your mind?” I laughed and began the chatter. Oh can’t you just see this, can’t you see that, We could do this, we could do that. I think I went on for the entire ride back to Brandon. WELL we decided to MAKE THE MOVE. We spent weeks over here painting, cleaning, and cutting down holly bushes. A friend of mine let us borrow heaters for that first winter and we got everything moved in just in time for my sweet husband to sit on the front porch and give out candy on Halloween night. haha Some time went by and we decided to make good on our rent to own agreement and the rest was history.
That first Christmas I put up 5 Christmas Trees. IT was a blast. Many years have gone by and MUCH hard labor, hard earned money, and hard core decorating has made this house a HOME. TRUTH is over the last few years I had mentioned us moving back to Brandon and Dennis wouldn’t budge. He finally told me one night, “babe, don’t mention moving to me again. We aren’t going anywhere.” THEN he said, “You brought me here kicking and screaming so I’m here to stay.” I was like “baby, you never said a word, you weren’t kicking and screaming,” He said, “well I was on the inside, ” hahaha
BLESS HIM. WE had some unbelievable times in this BIG OLE house. Oh the stories it could tell. The memories I cherish so much now. The ole saying, “home is where the heart is”, is more true than I ever imagined. Needless to say it’s not the same without Dennis here but HIS LIFE remains in and around me in this OLE house. This rock still remains under the tree in our backyard.
Someday will be moving day for all of us. Life is a JOURNEY not a destination….